I have a love-hate relationship with spring

Honestly, out of the whole month, there were maybe two days without a pre-migraine, migraine or post-migraine. Two days without a headache or migraine-related symptoms. Two days of awesome clarity, clear and sharp thinking, where I got things done. On those days the world seems so intensely sharp and vivid. And you are so very aware it is not a good thing that this is a rare occurrence rather than the norm. It is hard for me to keep a balance since chronic migraines three days out of the week can easily lead to much more. One bad week of say five migraines takes its toll and might then lead to another bad week or into a status migraine.

The rest has been migraine hell really. The weather unpredictable, combined with lack of sleep, more light and, of course, the predictable hormonal migraine. It is becoming quite the drain. When you get a status migraine, a migraine that lasts continually for three days, it is killer on the body overall. Hard to break and takes some time to recover from. Unfortunately, these migraines are very hard to break. As a result, you try damn near everything once, then again and then in different combinations in order to do so, because the pain is maddening. A person simply needs to have some migraine-free days to recover and to dampen the triggers, otherwise, it is just one migraine leading into another.

Anyway, the pain is driving me to distraction. I tried taking some holiday days from work to break the pain pattern, but it did not work. I got some sleep and did not need to expose myself to daylight, but the migraine stuck with me. It has been an extremely long month. In which, I have used too many triptans in order to combat these enduring migraines, such that they do not seem to be doing the trick now. So at this point, I am pretty screwed, as there is nothing else I am capable of doing to get rid of the pain, aside from a trip to the ER (where the chances of success only increase by maybe 10%). Sometimes when I get frustrated enough, or desperate enough, I go to the ER because I like to think they can help, are there to help, but that is not always the case… actually, it is rarely the case. They pretty much do the same thing as you can do at home, somehow under the impression you have not already tried everything. Which is how I get into these situations with drawn-out status migraines because while I know it is not good and I know it is recommended to seek medical attention, I also know the ER staff know less about these than I do and all I will get for my effort is more frustration and a lingering sense of disappointment. That being said, about the only thing to do when migraine frequency increases exponentially is set up an appointment with my neuro and hope the situation does not get out of control.

Still, I do love spring. It is brutal and bright, but when I feel the sunshine, the wind losing its bite and the snow melting it makes me feel like I have more energy. Makes me damn happy to see the snow retreating.

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