Brain beffufflment

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A person came into my workplace today. Someone I know very well. My pharmacist assistant. She greeted me by name, as she does when I come into the pharmacy. She asked about my migraines since a storm was rolling in. Is this odd? Not at all. How could she not remember me when I go to the pharmacy once a week for refills. Sad. So very sad. On my part, not hers. I can’t remember any of my customer’s names a few seconds after they are out of the office. I have to laugh, in a sad kind of way, when someone asks if a particular person is my customer because usually, my answer is ‘No. Well, the name sounds familiar. Hmm. Maybe.’

Speaking of which I have been living up to the brainless part of the brainless blogger. Can’t seem to get a sentence out right these days. Or at least it starts off fine… ‘Oh, I know what you mean, just the other day I, uh, spat out pickles fuzzle, huh?’ or something much like that that made little sense to me or the customer. Sometimes I get my point across and sometimes not so much. Sometimes I just trail off and speak softer so that they might just think they did not hear me because I have a soft voice rather than my brain stuttering to an incomprehensible jibber jammer. Much like when my hearing goes or is ringing so loud I cannot much hear anything else, I pretend to have a cold so people will not think I am an idiot for miss-hearing simple things.

What can you expect with daily migraines? There is no halting the stupid once those get going. The thing is it is not just the brain that gets tired, it is the whole me. Very tired. Very confused in the morning staring at my alarm clock trying to figure out what time it is only to find out I am running late and much have unconsciously hit the snooze button for an hour. That sort of tired. Obviously, time to call the neuro and try and get a grip on this slippery slope. Thing is, it has been this bad before, and before that, and before that… the only thing that is keeping me moderately upright is the painkillers, without them I would be as I was two years ago and not doing much of anything. So thumbs up to painkillers. Maybe I ride on through this on them until I find a better preventative, rather than switching preventatives, have things get worse than worse and end up not being able to work at all.

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2 comments

  1. I have been reading your blog and b/c I have had migraines for 20+ years I can totally appreciate it. I am so sorry you are having such a terrible awful horrible time. I wish things will get better for you.

    Like

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