Day 25 migraine awareness month “Why Change is So Hard” video: This short video (embed video) goes to bat for the “lazy people” who resist the change they dream of, and why they might not actually be lazy at all! What do you think about the intriguing research discussed here, and what do you think you would do if you’d participated in the study? Do you think this explains how you act when you’re in the middle of a headache or migraine attack?
This is intriguing. The speaker basically states that constantly monitoring our behavior, as in when we want to adjust or change a habit or behavior involves a lot of self-control and is mentally exhausting. We all know this to be true. It takes a long time to establish a new habit such that it becomes a new ingrained habit we do without thinking. And it is easy to slip up our fallback on old habits when we try to make changes.
And the damnable thing is that with chronic illness we are Constantly trying to make changes to our lifestyle and health routines. Because it is said to be good for us. Maybe. Might be. Who the hell knows half the time. Some of those studies are pretty half-assed. But we do it. Half the time I do it just to get the neuro to shut the hell up about it. But I do it. And it is damn exhausting. At times I think maybe it is because these people demand so much all at once that these tasks become insurmountable. I think if it were one change at a time in small steps it would be easier on the brain. And I would be less inclined to want to smack the neuro up side the head. And then say you accomplish something, like losing weight, and you go back… then it is Something Else that might help instead and you just want to scream. It is always something. And it always will be something. And that is what is so damn exhausting. No one is perfect and we cannot be perfect for these people because they will find some sort of change they think we can do that will help us, no matter what we have already done.
That being said, we want to progress and try to adapt and change and see what changes may help us out. But I believe firmly that we should pace ourselves. Make small achievable goals on Our timeline and no one else’s. However, it is difficult to progress that is for sure. Pain is a difficult stumbling block to overcome on a constant basis when you combine it with all the other changes you have to make. It reminds me of my battle to quit smoking. When I am stressed and in a lot of pain I would smoke, especially at work. They were very tied together. It never worked when I tried to quit because every time I got into a strong cycle of pain I would start up again. Even now that I am not working I find it difficult to overcome the habit although I have gotten down to 9-10 smokes a day which is substantially better. I just need to overcome that last hurdle. Nevertheless, it is a large one, when pain is that stress trigger. Yet I am letting myself have the time to do so since I am determined to achieve the goal.
And that is a problem right there. The actual migraines themselves. So you have these goals set out to change something in particular and to do so you are monitoring your behavior all the time to resist the temptation to go back to the way things were. And along comes the migraine and all that pain. And the temptation to go ‘screw it’ because you are in a lot of pain and you are tired. Back to my smoking example. Smoking would provide a stress relief for me when I had No way to manage the pain. As in the pain was just going to be there and there was nothing I could do but wait it out. And so I would have a smoke and relax for a bit. So taking that away is hard. A constant effort. When the migraines hit, it is twice as much effort, especially when I have nothing to manage the pain with.
Frankly, I think we need to give ourselves a bit of a break, to be honest. I think when we are in a lot of pain maybe it is hard to keep to some of our goals all of the time. That does not mean we screwed up the entire goal if we faltered one day. In the end, it means it may take us more time to achieve our goals and that I think is fine. We can have a lot of goals we want to achieve so taking our time, pacing ourselves, having small steps in mind can really help out. And one goal at a time is also a good idea.