I choose this one because I am focusing on this in pain management to decrease the suffering that comes with chronic pain. Not the pain, which I cannot control. But the suffering. Things like meditation which is important to get into the habit of and I find quite useful. Other things are a gratitude journal, a mood journal and distraction techniques. Then of course, relaxation breathing for when the pain is brutal.
This one words and all I choose because of the nature of the Facade we use to mask our pain. I use humor as a firm base to mask my pain and when I don’t use that I am very stoic and quiet. Either way, I have to remind myself that not communicating about my pain isn’t always a good thing. I am the sort of person who prefers to suffer in silence. I don’t like the pain game. Where I say I’m having a bad day and someone inevitable has to point out how there elbow hurts. Or that they feel worse. Or that it could be worse for me. So I generally just prefer to not mention it at all. And I downplay it to doctors because of gender bias. And I firmly believe that my loved ones would prefer not to know how I actually suffer. So silence it is. But this is confusing. To everyone but me. It is important to communicate pain so people understand where you are at and what you can and cannot do that day. So they understand, in my case, my silent moments when I don’t laugh and am in high pain are Not anger, which is also how I am angry. Confusing, right? I don’t like to speak in anger, so I tend to not speak at all under I chill out. I have to learn a facade is Useful but it isn’t a permanent state of affairs.
Well, I want to be a fighter. And reminding myself I have survived this long helps with that. I have fought hard and long and sometimes I feel defeated by this war. And I get there is no victory in this war. But there can be battles I can win. So I want to be the warrior. I want to be a fighter who continues to thrive. Because I tell you sometimes I do not thrive and I do not want to fight at all.