I am going to tell you a secret. I am an introvert. It is true. I’d rather write on this blog than talk to anyone really. And I do not find this to be a problem. I like being an introvert. I think introversion is pretty awesome. I think a great deal about everything. I am introspective. Philosophical. Contemplative. Reserved. Reclusive. Hermit. All right so the last part seems to be the ‘issue’. I have a lot of hobbies. And they all involve me and the indoors and not the outside world and people.
So my psychologist thinks isolation is a Big Deal to people with chronic illness who are not working (currently, as that is a work in progress, my leave that is) and isolation is a factor in depression.
And Winter is an Isolating factor in Canada.
I personally do not want to go out in This. As in, my back yard.
It is cold out there. It is windy and it is cold. And pain is worse when it is cold. And I want to hibernate all winter long. Is that so wrong? No, no it is not.
He suggested some sort of charity work that was the sort you could not have a rigid scheduled. I mentioned something online. He said, no real people. I mentioned those people at the SPCA that pet or walk animals. He said, No People. I don’t think he quite grasps I don’t like peoply places. That it isn’t a necessary thing for me. That I have some socialization every month and that is okay by me.
I don’t feel isolated. I am not lonely. I enjoy my hobbies immensely. I fail to see the problem, to be honest. I think if I crave people I can just go be around them… like go to a cafe and bring my laptop with me. Or go for coffee with my mom and actually have some social time.
Also pain and fatigue. I was telling him how immensely fatigued I have been. Such that when I have an errand to run… I have been putting it off. By the by, my doc says that I should also exercise and get out of the house to help manage the fatigue. So far, not helping. Just more fatigued. It actually really makes this concept difficult. To do anything on any sort of schedule that is. When I feel any teeny bit of energy I do get those errands done and it drains me. I need to up my B12.
Anyway, point is isolation seems to be an internal thing. I have felt it in the past for sure. But right now I do not. I feel profound relief I am not working at the moment. Not isolated. Just profound, utter, the relief I do not have to work in the pain I am in right now. And we all feel isolated somewhat in the winter, here and other bitterly cold tundras, because it is harder to get out and do things. So we do have to make some effort to find things to do outside of the house at least once a month.